Out and about, on my travels walking with my son....making the most of our time before I start working a late shift!....got me thinking!
It was only 10 months ago, that I found myself at a cross roads..... I was so poorly!
I wasn’t sure if I would live or die.
I was blessed with life so I made the decision to change everything and start my life again as it should be lived.
Since that day I have changed my route from the path that society has created and wants me to walk on.....to the path less walked!
On this path, I have been faced with many more cross roads....left questioning which path I should take or better still should I just play it safe and remain where I’m at??? Now I decide where I’m walking and heading.....Not where society expects me to, and if I want to take both routes....I will!! Yes I still work part-time whilst I build my business, but I know I am working towards my goals daily and working towards mine and my families future, the rest of the time!
Life is great
I am blessed
I am grateful
Thankful for the rainbows 🌈 ❤️
Three years ago this weekend was one of the hardest times of my life- it’s hard to share but if there’s a chance it helps someone, it’s worthwhile... 8/17/16 I suddenly miscarried the baby we expected before Sam... i was almost 12 weeks and it was like a freight train physically and emotionally that night, and then poof... just like that- I wasn’t pregnant anymore... I was talking this week to a friend about how our bodies know when we’re safe, how brilliantly intelligent and divinely protected we are at times... I remember carrying a puke bag to my car after many workdays because the minute it was time to go home, my body would let go, I could hold it in to work all day and then bam- we’re done, ok, we’re gonna go ahead & start puking 🤰🏻🤮... oddly, this horrible day felt like I was protected by this crazy body intuition & a higher power at the same time my heart broke. I was supposed to be on a flight 12 hours after bleeding started- the next morning for a one day biz trip, but I wasn’t- I was home safe with time to cancel & off work anyways... my incredible boss covered for me and demanded I take full bereavement leave beyond that one day... Anna was a bad sleeper at the time, yet that night she went right down and slept through the night- I had space to not have to turn my attention to anyone else... to thrash & hurt & grieve... to be taken care of myself... the experience I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy gave me gifts of knowing there’s a greater power looking out for us in dark times and gave me deeper compassion for others who’ve gone through pregnancy loss. It’s hard to think about that day but i find some peace now in the little protections evident in it... and of course there’s huge gratitude for our healthy boy who came next... it can feel confusing to grieve this baby when it would have changed the family we see now, but they still existed... I’m so grateful for our rainbow, and sometimes it feels important to honor the storm ⛈ ❤️ if you’re in a storm, hang on, and know I’m here as a friend- you’re not alone- I pray for your 🌈
Sometimes you’ve just got to look back to see how far you’ve come 👏 I’ve spent some time this morning reflecting while writing my check in to @emiliathompsonphd and I can’t believe how far I’ve come in the last 11 months working together. No guilt from a weekend away enjoying lots of yummy foods & not training ❤️ I encourage everyone to look how far they’ve come in the last year too 😌
More than half way through the year.. how on earth did that happen 🤷🏼♀️😳😶. The hours, days & months are flying.... I have now found my feet and I am thoroughly enjoying both the rewarding and more challenging aspects of the new position. We’ve taken on a lot this year; on top of my new role at a new school, Cam has been renovating our house, we bought a puppy, we are now babysitting another puppy, I’ve been training for a marathon, Archie is enjoying his final pre school year & Seb has started his carpentry apprenticeship 🤣 (jokes about the last one)... what will the remainder of the year bring?! #reflecting#halfyearreflection#teacherlife#morningtonpeninsula
I have been reflecting (see what l did there😉)on what this insta page means to me first it was to motivate me into getting my arse out of bed and dressed for the day by putting up a fashion posts but funny l don't feel the need to do that anymore, then l was going to use it to market lipsense my new little pocket money hobby which just didn't feel right doing it on this page @wmanonamission was meant to be about being on a mission to be my best self which involves more than just me it involves my family and friends and whats happening to our wonderful world. I hope you stay and follow this journey it may not always be exciting but l hope a little thought provoking and probably no where near as often ...
I love having new things: new diary, new dress, new opportunity, new gadget, etc. ⠀
More importantly, I love the newness that God brings. It springs forth and we are aware of it. He transforms us along the way, and in comes a new praise. ⠀
Newness keeps life exciting. The old passes and new life begins. You become unstuck. Newness makes life worth living.
Looking at my life now, is it where I thought my life would be? No. I love this ride I call living. As I write this blog in a hammock over looking a rainforest I smile. I’m proud of the decisions, hard work and gambles I’ve taken so far in my 31 years of existence. Would I change a single thing? Hell no! Including the pains, losses and heartbreaks.... they spurred me to be who I am and where I am today. #reflecting#life#choices#daisyontours
This is me...Grounding in with nature in between meetings, in the middle of my busy work day...🌿🍃 My boots are off and my feet are firmly on the grass for some down time, chilled out music and podcasts for the next hour... More than ever I’m realising how important it is to slow my body, brain and nervous system, in an ever increasing work, social and Sydney lifestyle.
What are you tuning into today? Today I’m listening to these podcasts about what Men want & also what Women crave!! I also have some of my favourite Rufus in my ear 🎧 ...I would love to know your thoughts on the conscious conversations below. Do they resonate & feel alive for you? I am certainly leaning in, reflecting on past relationships, how I show up and everything I’m calling in for my future.
it hasn't been a year. do you know i am waiting for the year to end? not this year, our year. maybe it'll help me figure out what to do. do you know i've been counting my thoughts the way people count stars and i keep trying to put my fears to sleep but there aren't enough stars.
today i looked out the window and thought how nice - the green was so bright and it soothed my eyes and the yellow? the yellow in the room made me so angry that when we finally made it disappear i felt like i no longer had to fight.
i sometimes can catch you looking at me because i am not always myself you see- i stand outside my body - it's become a habit to know what and where everything is. this person who stands outside - i hope you get to meet her often. i think she often misses you. she often misses looking at you without looking at herself too.
the truth is i was left alone as a child and i built all these people inside my head and now when i find people i can keep that aren't part of my imagination, i start to dig in my fingers. and my heart can't handle my rough fists and my mouth can't handle saying the truth so let me say it here.
i feel like i will die if i don't get enough love. but you know what the magic trick is? the secret code? it has to be from me. it can't be from you. i don't know why i try to add everything up in the same box. why i try to fix everything in one way. i can't do everything at once. i am not super woman. you know i need help. i know i need help.
i know i won't let you help me but sometimes i don't know how to either. i don't know how to let you in.
I am feeling totally emotional tonight between knowing that our oldest boy starts primary 2 tomorrow and watching Emma Willis delivering babies which just brings back all the memories of labour and with Ollie being one next week it’s had me reflecting on the past year.
This time last year I was 1 day over due, totally fed up and SO anxious about meeting our little boy. We thought we were only dealing with a cleft lip which we knew could be so easily sorted but didn’t stop all our worrying. Our life’s were turned upside down just a few hours after Ollie was born and it’s something I have really struggled to come to terms with even tho I put on this brave face and act like everything is ok, we really have been tested emotionally and mentally. Almost 1 year on I am feeling happier, more confident with how to deal with everything. I have learnt SO much from suctioning, passing NG tubes, tube feeding, I really have surprised myself 😂. I know there will still be some tough days ahead but if we can get through what we have this last year, we can get through anything!
I have just totally rabbled on, this is what happens when your partner works night shift and you over think things! 🤦🏻♀️ #chargesydrome#cleftlip#cleftlip#clapa#chdawareness#heartwarrior#reflecting#aberdeen#emmawillis#glasgowchildrenshospitalcharity#tof#ollie#cleftproud#cleftstrong#cleftlipandpalate#cleftpalate#emotional#complex#quote#overthinking#life#proudmummy